|" Goodbye My Lover|
Goodbye My Friend
You Have Been The One
You Have Been The One For Me"
- JAMES BLUNT SONG AT THE BACKGROUND -
It’s hard to believe that I got all sentimental over a car. The saying, you don’t know what you have until you lose it. My husband and I bought a car together when we started getting serious in our relationship. We bought a family car. I guess it came with big hope for the future. We took turns using the car. And at one point when my office was out of town, I took the car for a while.
Then we got married…. And that was the car we used for our wedding. Well at least the local wedding. (We married twice in 2 countries) When my youngest brother go married, we used our car as well.
Then I got pregnant. For someone who was not supposed to be able to conceive (Read “MIRACLE”), we found out that I was pregnant & I remembered sobbing with joy in that car! 38 weeks later, I remembered very well putting our tiny firstborn into that car, and drove to welcome her into our home.
I remembered turning to the backseat ever so often to check if she was ok….or if the sun was too much on her… the typical worries of a new mom. It was also in that car when we held hands & just watched the sun set.
It has traces of history marked every inch of it. And today when I saw it drove away into a tiny dot, I felt a little tightness in my heart.
I know you find me silly for being too attached to the car. Especially when my husband ended up using it more than I do eventually. But it was OUR FAMILY car. We bought the car with a hope to fill it up & we did fill it up with 2 car seats! :)
Lately, my husband has sole use of the car. He uses it to fetch us wherever we needed him, to drop my daughter to school or to help us with groceries. He would be there for us. However, should I need to travel during the day, I usually just call for a cab instead of having him chauffer me around.
Unlike in U.S, the cabs in Singapore do not have car seats. So traveling with 2 year old & one year old can be a little difficult to handle when you also have to deal with the pram & your own stuff. Still, I managed to tolerate the inconvenience & accepted the lifestyle. While my daughter was being dropped off to school, we had the maid fetching her from school every day mid-day.
That changed recently. There was a fatal accident near where I lived. A 2 year old was in the cab with her maid. Her maid was sitting behind the driver while the 2 year old was sitting in the middle of the cab, unbuckled. The cab was hit & the 2 year old was flung through the front glass window & died instantly. It was reported that the child’s mother has reminded the maid every day to buckle her child when taking the cab home. The maid claimed that that was the first time the child wasn’t buckled. Coincidence? I don’t think so. The thing about maids is that it’s just a job. No parent could check if they actually do buckle their kids in the cab.
Anyway, since the news, I became paranoid about it & have been fetching my own child. 2 days later, I decided to get myself a car so that I can chauffer my daughter to and fro school. And when I thought about safety, no price is too expensive. I could just imagine how that parent feels losing their only child… my heart goes out to them.
So while I was in the midst of getting a car, we were discussing about the options. Everyone thought that my husband was going to sell his to buy mine. But actually we didn’t plan to do anything with his car. But an idea was planted into his brain when we talked about stuff. It’s actually true that the car seats would be in my car now and therefore during weekends he would jump into my car instead of the other way round.
So when we really thought about it, he really doesn’t need a big family car anymore does he? So we talked about it last Friday. The option of selling our first car. He called the car dealer and arranged for a viewing on Monday. We had a fantastic weekend, driving around … none of us even realised that that would be the last time we all would be cruising in that oh-so-comfortable car.
On Monday, my daughter became unwell. We drove to the clinic nearby and after that he went off to let his car being viewed. When he came back, he showed me a cheque.
Yup, that car is such a good car which has been so well maintained with very low mileage – who wouldn’t grab it. All of a sudden, my heart sank deep & I went silent. We went for dinner but I wasn’t in the mood to eat. I was quiet & inside me I felt a little confuse, trying hard to understand what just happened.
On the way home, I told my husband I didn’t think it was going to be sold that fast!
This afternoon, we left home at 1 pm to have one last spin in our car. The car that was with us since we built “US”. It was pretty sad for me. The kids were too young to understand. The hand over was supposed to be at 1:30 pm. When we arrived at our car park, the dealer was already there…. It felt like our car was on the death bed & the dealer was like the black angel pulling the plug off. It was a strange feeling. I reminded myself that it was just a car!
I looked around the car…. And found my daughter’s health book which we lost like a year ago! :) Ok, that’s not enough reason to pull me out of my sad state.
Anyway, we shook hands. Took a last picture together & we all waved till we couldn’t see the car anymore…. As we took the lift up to our apt, I felt a strange loss in my heart. Weird. It’s just a car!!! I reminded myself…. But I can’t help how I am feeling… ok…. Let me be sad & gloat about it. Hard for you to understand anyway…. But I’ll get over it….
I’ll feel better when I get my car soon! Meanwhile…. Sob! Sob! Sob!