I'm Not Cute, Mommy

This afternoon when I picked my kids up at their playgroup, the Principle and their teacher were going all crazy about my son going on a holiday.

They said they would miss him since he is the life of his little group and he is somehow the favourite of everyone. Well, he is a charmer. He smiles and even cheers on people he doesnt know. He basically makes people just wanna grab him & kiss him. Not that he's complaining. I'm sure that skill will come in handy when he's a teenager. :)

While the two ladies were going on and on about my son, my 3 year old daughter was standing there once in a while trying to smile or give flying kisses like what my son was doing. She probably felt like she needed to do that to be noticed? I don't know... She didn't say much but when we got into the car and as I was buckling them into the car seat she suddenly said " Mommy, I'm not so cute."

I was so surprised at that sentence. "Who told you that?"

"They don't smile and play with me like they do with him."

Wow. She has come to an age whereby she realised the preferences the teachers are giving. I hugged her and told her that she is my beautiful little girl.

She wasn't convinced but she wasn't going to pout about it either. It was more like her stating the fact and move on. Very mature of her. The rest of the afternoon, I reminded her constantly that she has beautiful hair, I love her smiles, etc, etc

She didn't look like she even remember about the extra attention that her brother was getting. Oh well.

It's something for me to take note. That she has learned to realise preferences.

Prestiousolutions Aesthetic Centre

About 6 months ago, I received a call from an aesthetic centre. My job is in marketing, therefore I tend to be more forgiving with marketing calls. This company claimed that my name has been chosen to receive a complimentary face treatment with no obligation. They also said I could bring a friend along.

According to them, their main goal is to create awareness about their presence in this industry. Even if I do not want to stay for the sales talk, apparently I was more than welcome to just come by & claim the complimentary treatment. Strange. How would they gain from this campaign? They said they are sponsored by VISA card.

Alright. I told them they would need to call me back since I didn’t have my calendar right then. After several calls, possibly 5 or 6 times later, I finally said yes and we made an appointment only last Sunday. Which would have been 4 months after I said yes. I booked in for my husband & I.

As the day drew closer, I began to get reminders after reminders about my appointment. They also reminded us that they need us to bring our ID & our VISA card.

A day before the appointment, another text message came telling me where to park, etc. On the day itself, I received a reminder. An hour before the appointment, another text message came asking if I was on the way.

Strange. They do look desperate. In any case, we had an open mind. We usually do not expect much from a free treatment. However, our investment was more on arranging our days.

Our Weekends are usually fully booked with parties or appointments or catching up sessions. Seeing that they said we should put aside 2 hours for this treatment, we arranged our schedule accordingly... to work around this appointment. We also have to drive an hour to the north to drop my kids before we drive to the centre for this treatment. Then again another hour to pick them up.

So, even though it was a free thing, our time & effort weren't easy to arrange. Nevertheless, we managed & we arrived on time.

Upon arriving, they asked for our ID. My husband was asking the relevance for the ID & they didn't seem to mind to explain.

The place was white and clean but it wasn't cosy or SPA like. It was more clinical than anything else. All my husband asked was the relevance for the ID.

All of a sudden, we saw a change. They didn't ask for 2 IDs like they stated in the text message "NO ID, NO TREATMENT" They also didn’t bother for us to fill up the form about our medical history - a typical routine before any facial treatment. They just asked my husband to sign a blank form with his name on it. They didn't even bother to offer me a form at all. So something was weird there. I didn’t say anything.

We were told at the front desk that we will be getting a cleansing, scrub and mask treatment. We just nodded politely since we have no idea what this whole "treatment" supposed to comprise.

So we were led to a "couple room". It wasn't like we were next to each other. We were at a different angle of the room so much so that we might as well be in a different room. We sat there without any instruction so I asked if we were supposed to take out our shirts  like it would have been the case for most face treatment.

They said no. Strange. We laid down, they pulled a thin blanket over our fully dressed body. Yes my husband still had shoes on. And the air con was warmish.

The ladies didn’t wash their hands before they started foaming their hands. They are possibly cleaning their hands while foaming & lathering and place all their germs into our face. They also have a bucket of water in the middle. For these two ladies to wash their towels to put on our faces.

Hygiene is not a plus point here. But that was nothing yet. The first minute, they lathered their hands and cleanse our face. Rinsed off. Then they scrubbed our face very quickly. Possibly one minute. Rinsed off. Then they applied something clear which they claimed is their magical mask. It was still wet when they said "Ok, all finished!"

Of course I was confused. I stayed there for a while since it has been a total of 6 minutes for the whole treatment! Can this be real? Then the lady came into the room again and said it was done. I stood up and told my husband that she said it was done. He said it couldn’t be since his face was still wet. I said that was what she said.

Confused, I stepped out & asked the front desk. She was like no.no.no... I said "oh, ok, for a while there I thought that was it."

Then she came into our room. Now I realised that she just didn't want me to say it in front of her other clients at the front/waiting area.

She came in & explained that the mask is a special mask. She took a mirror and said it would be an instant change. I looked at myself in the mirror & shook my head. What was I supposed to look for?

Anyway she said it was an option to keep it for 10 min and they can wash it off for us or we could leave it on for at least 3 hours. The longer the better she said.

"So the whole treatment is done?" She said, people who had tried this magical mask would come back themselves to get a package. So no selling required.

Alright ...  but I was still confused. At that time, I have to admit that  I didn’t know how to react to that situation. We just left.

In the car, we were like "What has just happened here?"

We talked it through. When we walked in, they must have scanned us & realised we are no one to be doing hard selling since we are pros at that! Haha. So when they took our ID, they knew that they couldn’t sell us anything. So they didn't bother to give us the forms since they know we will not be a client.

They then decided not to give a complimentary treatment and just gave us a cleansing of our faces since they are not getting anything out of it. Instead of a 2 hours session as promised, they withdrew their offer & only gave us a 6 minute treatment.

But is it fair?  I have re arranged my schedule to make this appointment happen. We drove all the way to drop our kids for babysitting and another hour to drive them back... we changed our plans for this. And the whole thing took 6 min? We didn't get the treatment we were supposed to get.

They wasted our time, our car fuel, our parking fee, our effort in re arranging our schedule, driving up to the north just to drop our kids off, only to fetch them soon after.... they have wasted a lot of our time & energy which we could have used to play with the kids and do something for them.

If their plan was to create awareness, they have failed miserably. They probably didn't realise who we are and the crowd we are hanging out with. Through our network, they could have at least gotten 60 clients easily if we have favoured them positively. And these clients wouldn’t even mind spending $5000 on their faces. I know I'm the only weird one out, but the people I hang out with are into all these.

But this centre chose to decide to waste our time. Indeed they will get awareness. We will of course tell our network what we have experienced.

The only awareness they will be getting is avoidance. At all cost. In future, even for free, no one would want to step into their arena. Their ruthless marketing campaign has been thoughtless & inconsiderate.

I wrote a text message back to that same number that gave me too many reminders. Telling them that it was a shame that they chose a wrong way to market their services. I'm working in an advertising & marketing industry, I can assure them that whatever scam they are trying to pull, will not work.

Since that text message, I have been receiving 28 missed calls from the centre. I do not want an explanation, another offer or anything from them. It’s done and over it.

Address: 1 oxley rise

The Brag Wives Club

To be fair to all, I shall not be mentioning the name of the company I’m about to dish on. ;) Let’s imagine we are all sitting around like one of those Alcoholic Group Session and go “Hi my name is XXX and I’m an alcoholic.”

Now I really wonder why this little gathering I went to, didn’t have a sit around session and cut to the chase “Hi my name is XXX. I’m the wife of XYZ & I’m wearing a Prada dress, Gucci handbag, Victoria secret G-string & Push up bra, Chanel cosmetic, my fake lashes extension were done in YYIO beauty centre, my hair …..” Zzzzzzzz …. Ooops, sorry… were you not done?…. I must have doze off ….

Honest to god, sometimes the term “full of themselves” is just too humbling when you really meet these people I met! Yes I am also the wife of a partner in that company. But I am more known as the “rebel” as I do not take pride in being the wife of a partner. I rather be ….  Me! ;)

For the many years that my husband works there, I’ve only been to 2 events. Surprised? Mind you, these events are usually in top notch places where they serve caviar & the best delights. Yet, I’m not a big fan of going to his company functions. Husbands tend to fall into the tendency of discussing about work. Which leaves the wives checking out each other and making sure that the others know that they are better than the rest.

It’s crazy. I am a simple person. Well, I was even known as a tomboy once upon a time but I’m a mommy now so I’ve walked through many stages of my life to tone down by a fair bit. I am also a successful career woman & a business mogul. I worked through the hours & juggling taking care of my kids all in one plate. I can’t judge for myself if I’m doing a great job but I am successful even before my husband stumbled into my life.

My bank account makes financial officers call me every week to convince me to invest in them. I am financially strong and have been independent since the day I started working. I’ve studied, worked & arrived to where I am independently & I take pride in that since there was a whole lot of hard work involved.

I am so independent that I’m always known to many as being feminist. I really think I am anyway. I insisted on paying half the wedding cost, I contribute half the household expenditure and even help my husband in some of his businesses. So I am not one who suddenly finds herself financially strong & suddenly think she is a different person.

I am not trying to be super annoying (even though I'm starting to sound like that). I'm just trying to point out that maybe...just maybe.... not EVERY partners' wives want to be the damsel in distress only to be rescued by the white & shining armour. And after being rescued, the princess thinks she has to be someone else because now she is suddenly rich!

Due to the fact that I’ve always worked hard in everything I do, juggling too many things at any given time in my life including charity work, I have never been a religious manicure, pedicure or hair salon enthusiast. Somehow a lot of people find that hard to believe. I remembered in one of those dinners I went & I could see the way these wives were checking out my nails, my toes & my hair. They were not disgusting, mind you…  they were just not coloured or polished up to their standards.

I guess I do not fall into the right mould of a perfect partner’s wife. Before I went on dishing, I am in no way attacking anyone. I’m just voicing out my upsets.

Get it – one of them leaned over , tapped my arm & said “Honey, you’ve worked way too hard I see. Maybe you should take some time off to pamper yourself. You need it.”

Ghees, thanks! At this point, I am the only one in there who hasn’t touched botox, collagen injections or resort to plastic surgery. I am also only 37. Yes, I’m not all taut but I have time before I consider these options. Or so I thought. These ladies would point out the lines on my forehead! Literally! They are so narrow minded that they think they are doing me a favour.

Most of these ladies led a fairly normal life before they met their husbands. When they got married, their lifestyles changed dramatically. It must have been too overwhelming for them. They suddenly think they needed to be someone else. I have to say that they are probably a very nice person before. But the exposure of too many good things led them to be too competitive about things which doesn’t necessarily is important to others.

They are nicknamed trophy ladies. They do not work. Neither are they housewives. They have their maids taking care of the chores at home & taking care of their kids. They spend their days in hair salons, nail studios, aesthetic clinics. And if they are not doing that, they are off from one champagne brunch to another.

Compare that to my daily routine! And they wondered why I don’t have time to run to the beauty centres? To top that off, I also do not enjoy having conversations about which hair salons or which boutique to buy their $5000 skirt. I somehow got interested to business conversations the boys were having. Yes, I’m weird.

I do know how to have fun. I dress myself in whatever that takes my fancy. I love happy bright colours. Branded clothing usually come in earth or what I termed as “sad colours” so it’s not because I’m a scrooge. I tend to dress myself in whatever attracts my eyes.

Maybe I do not need too much work done on me to look just as good. Well, I want to believe that at least! Haha.

Anyway, it's this kind of moments when the song my children were watching this morning make sense - by BIG BIRD from Sesame Street - I'm happy to be me.

In Vitro Fertilisation (IVF)

IVF. Used to be such a taboo topic to talk about. Although a lot out there are rather open about it these days, some are still not willing to share that part of their struggle.

Giuliana & Bill Rancic openly shared their journey & heartbreaks with us, especially with regards to them trying for a baby. Something so genuine & so honest, make it so pure that everyone of us at home watching them, secretly did a silent prayer to God to bless them somehow with a bundle of joy. They deserve it.

For them, they are  public figure and they chose to share with us their struggles, their lives, their heartbreaks with us. To many others, how they get their baby is completely none of anyone's business.

There are some celebrities too who wouldn't want to share this little secret with the world. Why so? Maybe because women are in general judgemental to others & especially to themselves. Accepting the fact that one is not able to conceive a baby naturally seems to be such a big failure in a woman's dictionary.

I can say this because since I was 15, I was told that I would not be able to conceive a baby. I have been growing up VERY medically dependent to a point that the doctor has suggested that my womb & uterus was inhospitable towards any growth of a foetus.

Thank god I wasn't promiscuous or using that as an advantage & go on a "slut" rampage! :) Maybe it wouldn't have happened with just any men but I'd be damn if I had gotten pregnant as a teenager!

I started being active rather late in my life. I was a little ...no, I am still accentric. I always try to live by my nickname for some strange reason. My nick is THE ONE & ONLY.

Growing up in a boarding school in NEW YORK, while kids were starting really young with drugs, sex & cigarettes, I was busy trying to be different.

On average, my schoolmates lose their virginity at the age of 14. And they were proud of it. While they were into makeup, I was into grunge. I was a virgin & I was proud of it.

This is funny about the school in NEW YORK. If there are bullies out there and they said some stuff and you somehow let them see that their words affect you, they'll continue to be in your case throughout your whole school years there.

When I first joined that school (I shall not name the school), I had an Australian accent. You couldn't have imagine the jokes that they tried on me. "Hey missy, you wanna go down UNDER?"

Me on the other hand, is a big feminist. One guy said that on my first day of school, I went straight to him, so close that our nose touched, staring dead serious into his eyes.... "I want to hear you say that one more time & I'll show you what's NOT UNDER here!"

I nudged towards his zipper. Something about the way I said it scared him. I saw him perspire while the rest of his gang were watching us. I turned to each and every one of the gang, giving them the coldest laser stare, showing them who is the boss from now on & these boys (They were the most popular in school) had never attempted to ever try to say anything about me.

That was how I started in school. And since then, nobody dared to even spread a rumour about me.

While the whole school was busy losing their virginity, I wasn't keeping my virginity a secret. I wasn't announcing it either but I wasn't shy to admit that I was if it was in the conversation. I know it was tempting for them to start a lesbian rumour but no one ever dared, because then they would have to deal with me.

I have to say I was lucky. So, me being anal about being different, somehow worked for the better of me. Just to be DIFFERENT, I ended up being a virgin with the best grades, never touched a cigarettes or drugs EVER! Now I have to say - that's rare even for today!

Also, not having parents growing up, I know I have no one to clean up my own mess (if I messed up my life that is). So I was adamant to do my best academically so that I will be successful in life & not be so hopeless in this world.

Would my kids be that strong? I doubt it. I have to say that it takes a lot of guts.

I was also not very interested in men. Maybe because I was afraid that if I do have a relationship, I would have stand down my guard & my feminist side got the better of me.

Once I graduated with degree & double honours, I was thrown into the working world. I got together with my childhood best friend with whom I've "tested the water" ;)

Throughout the whole time, I have never liked taking pills as contraception. We were just using condoms. Not that I was worried about being pregnant but more for sexually transmitted disease. We were both faithful but we were also super cautious. To date I have to say I have never seen any other men so cautious about everything in his life. Needless to say, I've never gotten pregnant.

Then I met my husband. I have warned him that I would not be able to conceive. I went as far as to talk to his mom, telling her not to be hopeful about any grandchildren from us. Both my husband and my mother in law didn't think that would be such an issue. So we got married.

Just over three months of being married, I suddenly had rashes. It started with my hand, then it was on my chest. I thought it was heat rash and didn't think much of it. But it became all bubbly and disgusting that I started to get very worried.

I have to meet clients very often and having long sleeves with turtle neck do make everyone wonder especially when it's 35 degrees out here! When the itch became really bad, I finally decided to see a doctor!

When the doctor checked, she asked if I had changed anything lately. Different moisturiser? Different food intake? Different milk? Anything at all. I haven't changed anything.

She wrote me a paper and told me to go to THOMSON MEDICAL CENTRE. It was a Saturday & clinics closes at 12:30 pm. It was 12:30 at that time but she said Caroline is a friend of hers and she would be waiting for me there. It was a favour which I truly appreciate.

We went there & having being told you could not conceive since you are 15, it's normal that one would protect herself by not being too exposed to anything baby related. I have no clue that THOMSON MEDICAL CENTRE is a place for pregnancy, delivery,  fertility, etc. Completely clueless. We did wonder if it was a baby boom since there were pregnant ladies everywhere. Still at that point, we didn't have it figured out that it's not a general hospital, it's a WOMAN's hospital.

Caroline told me to lie down. She asked a few questions. Honestly we were afraid she was going to tell us it was cancer or something. So ya, babies honestly were not in our minds.

She put some gel on my tummy, scanning through my tummy then a smile spread on her face. She looked at my husband, and then me & then she pointed out a little jellybean shaped thing.

"Is it tumour?!" I asked, somehow not noticing she was smiling.

"No," she laughed. "Congratulations. That's your little baby."

Complete silence for a while. I think I was waiting for her to say "Just kidding!"

But she didn't. I looked at my husband who looked completely confused too. Then I became angry all of a sudden. Imagine this - someone who loves kids and wished she could have her own was told all her life that she couldn't have any. And now a doctor she met for the very first time, smiled and said there you are! You are pregnant.

For some weird reason, I got pretty upset and questioned her if she thought that was a funny joke because it wasn't funny at all. And then I kept repeating "No, this is not true."

Seeing this, the doctor became confused (poor doctor…I’ve apologised) and thought I didn't want the baby. She apologised graciously. And then my husband quickly jumped in and explained my medical history. Then she looked at me like she wanted to give me a hug but decided to be professional. "This is a miracle baby."

My husband then smiled and said "My wife was born triplets. You found only one in here?" And with that, the quiet clinic was filled with laughter and happiness!

Immediately after that ‘diagnosis’ , my world seemed to be bigger. I started noticing a lot of things. I am allowing myself to indulge in cute babies. I love them but I was afraid I would yearn for them, so usually I kept a distance. Not anymore. That barrier has been broken. I wanted to tell the whole world but at the same time I know I should be in touch with my own doctor - the one who told me I would not be able to conceive.

I have to explain that this doctor of mine is a realist. Sometimes too much of a realist that emotion doesn’t come into play. When I told him I was pregnant, his reaction was somewhat disappointing. I thought he would be like “Wow!! It’s a miracle!!”

But no, he just read through the report from Caroline and he looked up, casually said congratulations and warned me that I should be realistic about my situation. He said that there has been no pregnancy for people with similar medical history as mine. So he would not want to get excited as yet since I could lose the baby any time. He said that I should not prepare anything as yet, not even a name because I could lose this baby tomorrow, in a few weeks, in a few months or as a stillborn.

Yes, it did sound like he’s a prick but mind you, he was just being realistic and didn’t want me to float so high that I might crash harder when I hit the ground. He was sort of “taking care” that I don’t go overboard with this new “situation”. Unfortunately, when he left, I became so down & was so sure that this baby will not survive.

Why? Have you read my history? Everything bad has already happened to me? What is one more thing right??!!!  It seems that I have been tested time and again and I felt that this would be the ultimate test of all.  I cried into my husband’s arm but as usual he has it all figured it out. He held me tight & went “This is our year. Let’s not dwell on this until something REALLY happens. For now, we do not do anything or even think about it unless necessary. Focus on yourself.”

And that was exactly what we did. I wasn’t sure if me being determined to not think too much about it (or if it was a coincidence) led to this pregnancy going by without any pregnancy symptoms at all. We didn’t tell anyone about our exciting news so that no one can ask about it when we were not supposed to even talk about it. It was like a little (but BIG) secret between my husband and I.

When I went partying, I ordered virgin Pina Colada. No one knew there weren’t any alcohol in my drink.  I continued working hard. And at one point of time I was even working till 4 am for a month trying to rush for a dateline. And I was 9 months pregnant at that time. I wasn’t showing till at least the end of my 6^th months.

Everyone thought I was gaining weight. We managed to keep it a secret till it was the 7^th month. Some people knew but we didn’t announce it. I was also traveling a whole lot for our jobs!

Suddenly it was time to give birth. Caroline has nothing negative to say about the pregnancy at all. The whole 38 weeks, the baby has grown at a beautiful rate.  25^th September 2009 – we went into the delivery room without having many things ready to welcome a new born.

During the delivery, it was an experience we had never bargained for. When our baby’s heart stopped during labour, I somehow had it in my head that that was “IT”. That was “THE MOMENT” my private doctor had warned me about. And that was when I would lose her. I closed my eyes & noted that situation. And somehow I must have ACCEPTED the fact that I could lose her. I opened my eyes and looked my husband who looked a little lost too.

Everything seemed to go in slow motion. The doctor was doing her best to resuscitate that tiny little heart inside my tummy. The nurses were scanning my tummy. There were about 5 people dealing and rushing with our situation. And then ….. “Beep…..Beep….beep” The monitor went again. Almost as sudden as when it stopped.

Everyone cheered. I was happy. Confused but happy. Very happy. Inside me I was a little angry since I was sad for no reason. We continued pushing. Caroline mentioned that we cannot let it happen one more time or we would really lose her. I have to push harder and get her out because the baby was tired. And her heartbeat was very weak. She said if her heartbeat stops again, they would have to cut me open and take the body out as it could be harmful for me if the blood from the umbilical cord runs back into my veins.

I went all out to get her out. But it didn’t happen. And then suddenly … her heartbeat stopped a second time. My eyes welled up. I knew what that means. Immediately, the nurses and the doctor scrubbed in and started to put on their surgery attires. I looked at my husband “Don’t let them cut me open.”

I was suddenly scared!  I know cutting me open means we were gonna see the “body” and it would all be confirmed. I didn’t want a confirmation.Let me stay at that status quo. I wanted time to stop. I was shaking so bad. In sadness. In anger. In loss. In Confusion. In defeat.

As they were preparing the surgery utensils, my husband (bless his soul) went to my tummy and started talking to your daughter. He said that he knew it wasn’t the end and that she could pull through this. He said that she should fight it through since her ‘special mummy’ has been there for her, fighting all odds to get her to this point. She should reciprocate that strength. I kid you not - Suddenly the monitor started beeping again!  I was like “What the hell??!!! This is a joke!!!” And the doctor went straight to my bottom again and told me to push immediately. I was like “huh? What?” Ok, I’m confused but let’s just do what she told me to do….

One, two and….. her head came out. Her eyes were wide open, looking around between my legs. I didn’t see all these. My husband told me about it. My husband came to me and said, “Her head is out … she’s beautiful.”

I did a few more push and just as sudden, she was placed on my chest. All covered in wax and all. All puffed up. Quite disgusting really. But she was my disgusting thing. :) My husband was videotaping the birth from the top. Not allowed down below. He was still taping my reaction and I had to turn to him and told him to switch it off.

How would she feel one day when she watches it & realise that I was numb when they put her on my chest. I didn’t react. I was feeling-less. I just looked at her, not even attempting to hold her. But will she understand then that a few minutes before our eyes met, her heartbeat stopped and I had lost her. That sense of acceptance was my way of dealing with it all. And I can’t even explain how it felt when you accepted and situation and suddenly the thing that you had just lost is blinking right in front of you!! I didn’t not react because I didn’t love her . I love her dearly, with all my heart.  I didn’t react because I love her too much & having lost her that last few minutes handicapped my emotions completely.

The nurses took her off me to weigh her, clean her and do a little test. My husband didn’t lose her in sight. He was with her making sure that she didn’t go anywhere.

Caroline came to me and said “it’s ok to open up to her again … she’s here now.”

And that made me realised that it’s all real now. She passed all the test and she is perfectly healthy. 

“What’s her name?” One nurse asked. I smiled & told them we haven’t got any. But I can tell them in one hour.

Once we were in our room, I was back on my lap top googling “MIRACLE” ….  There were a few names that came up. We chose one.

Her first name means MIRACLE. Her second name means THE BEST. She is simply the best miracle that has happened to me. Against all odds, even towards the end, she fought through and made it into this beautiful world. And I will do everything I can, and hopefully not smouldering her too  much, to make her life a very special one.

My husband did well in getting all the necessary things required for a new born. He has been wonderful in supporting this whole ordeal. I love him even more for what I saw he did for all of us.

He also know that to have our daughter is the greatest gift of all. So much so that he doesn’t want to be left out in being involved in bringing her up. He insisted to do the night shift. God bless him.

Have we ever considered IVF? Or adoption? Or surrogate mother? Yes we have. In fact, I had papers in my office which I was supposed to fill up that same week that I found out that I was pregnant. How ironic is that?

How lucky was I?  To get through the whole pregnancy without the slightest bit of symptoms… not even a craving! I’m still not sure if it was because I was avoiding thinking about it altogether. Or if it was all meant to be.

My private doctor came to congratulate me especially the fact that I was the first ever to have been pregnant & safely gave birth to a healthy beautiful baby. He also said that I should treasure my time with her since she would be the only baby I would ever conceive, since she is already a miracle!

Well, this is something to think about. I was predicted to have lived till I was 9 due to my illness. I am 36 years old today. I celebrate my birthday in a big way every year because for me it’s a big blessing to have another year. Then they said I would not be able to conceive…. My daughter is the best thing which has happened to me…and then guess what? Merely 6 months after my daughter was born, we found out that I was pregnant again.

Again, I didn’t have a clue. I was in Club Med Ixtapa, Mexico having a blast & a whole lot of champagne! I was celebrating life. We were so happy because we managed to travel 32 hours (door to door) to arrive to our destination with a 6 months old.

When I was late, we thought maybe it was due to the stress of arriving to our holiday destination. My sister who has been trying for 10 months for a second child was getting a little down that she still hadn’t conceived. When we told her that I was pregnant, we knew it would all be too confusing for her. “Wait a minute! You were not even be able to conceive & you conceive a second one??!! I don’t have health issues. Why haven’t I conceive?!”

Having said that, she was really happy for us. I gave birth to my second child on January 2011. My son is a healthy cuddly little thing. His name (was again goggled when he was born) means “the way to heaven”. He is indeed my way to heaven. He’s a happy boy who makes me laugh every day!

Yes I am really blessed. I still have a little fear at the back of my head wondering if this is too good to be true. My husband who is always the optimist, said that God is  just rewarding me for passing the insane tests he has passed down to me throughout my whole life (Read my history under the “ME GLORIOUS ME” tab). Maybe he is.

I’m going to embrace this new gifts. We had our life changing moments coming through one after another. It was overwhelming but I’m grateful.

I can completely relate to those who are not able to conceive. I know how it feels. Would I also consider IVF? If I have the money, yes I would.

Strange Pleasant Encounter

I've never been keen on Mondays. The term ‘Monday Blues’ must be created for a reason. If there is any day I choose to take time off work,  I would take Mondays.

Which I did yesterday. My best friend suggested going to IKEA because she needed some napkins from there. I thought 'Alright...since I have nothing planned. I'll come with you & we'll fetch my daughter at noon when her playgroup ends & take the kids to the indoor playground in Changi"

So after dropping off my daughter & my husband, my son, who is always in his best mood whenever I decided to take time off (thank god!), I went straight to IKEA. Gosh! The car park was almost full & it was just 10 am.

So we went in there & for some weird reason, I ended up with a trolley of things ... And I thought I was just there to accompany my friend

Anyway, I managed to somehow buy a mattress for my son & decided when I collected it at the customer service that it may be the wrong size after all. It was too late to do any exchange anyway. I was supposed to pick my daughter up!

So we went to pick my daughter up & straight to Changi. The "pleasure" of having three little kids with us, we literally went to baby care room 3 times because they needed changing. By the time we were ready to go to the indoor playground, my best friend got a call from her fellow Turkish friends & said she needed to leave soon.

So instead of going to the indoor playground, we just took the kids to the main playground which was free for everyone to play.

We probably spent like 30 min running around the kids and making sure they were alright. (Since there were big kids too)

Anyway, finally it was time to go. The children were tired and cranky by then. We managed to make our way to reach the lift. And a group of ladies held the door for us. We thanked them politely.

Then suddenly, the lady on my left said "You are very beautiful."

A little confused and somehow didn't believe anyone could be very upfront, I answered (stupid , I know) "You mean my children?"

The reason being my children have always been attracting people's attention. No one ever said anything about me. So that came as a big surprise for me.

This lady (probably in her late 40s or early 50s) was with her aunt (an even older lady) and her two daughters who are in their early twenties.

If it was a guy saying that to me, I would probably think he is a freak. But these ladies were decent looking, looks like they come from a proper-simply-polite family...you know like those nice people from the church who annoyingly have everything nice to say about the world.

Well, she said she had been watching us playing with our kids at the playground. I didn't think at that time but now that I was thinking about it I was wondering wow..... how amazing is it that you can be watched without even realising it the slightest bit!

For that split second I was hoping that maybe there was a cute hunk who had also spent time checking me out! Haha

She said she kept saying to her aunt that she wanted to speak to me but didn't ….  since I looked like I had my hands full with my two kids who seemed to enjoy running the opposite direction. :)

"I've been watching the way you handled the kids and the two of you (referring to my best friend) running around with the kids. I figured we would be a nuisance if we come and try to talk to you at that time. But now that I'm even closer, my gosh, you are beautiful. Where are you from? You must be mixed!"

She also said that she loves my best friend accent. She later said that the sight of both of us, 2 young looking mothers, beautiful & polite to other people was just refreshing.

"Most beautiful people are a snob" She added.

We talked a little bit and coincidently we were parking near to each other. These ladies helped us out with our kids and our stuff. It was a little overwhelming but maybe because it is not very usual that someone stumbled into your path and can be SO NICE! Rare , I have to say.

We exchanged numbers and she said again that fate has a way of putting us together. She is very keen to get to know us.

I told my husband about it. And he seemed very suspicious. He was like "You gave your number just like that? "

"She seems nice and she was with her aunt and two daughters"

"How would you know if they are even her aunt or daughters? She's probably a lesbian and can see the beauty that I see or they are a cult and they need a pretty head on their shrine. So be careful! Meet only in public places"

Sheeesh..... talking about being super paranoid! :) My best friend  and I talked about it very briefly. I said my husband was a little suspicious about her intentions.

And she said, " During the whole process, we didn't even realise it but it was flowing very smoothly and they were being nice.... it could be anything but honestly, she was there with her kids and aunt.... maybe it is JUST her being herself. NICE."

So it's still a mystery. We have no idea. She has my number and she will probably be in contact with me very soon. She seems sincere. I'll update you about it.

Meanwhile, let me gloat on the fact that she actually thought that I am VERY beautiful! ;) Oh come on! Just let me be! :)

Mandurah, West Australia



This is my favourite house at Mandurah, West Australia.

 Recently, we went back to my husband's hometown in Mandurah, Australia. It's a beautiful getaway. Although I'm a city girl & love the hustle & bustle of Singapore, it's nice to be able to just rest & relax sometimes.

We live in Singapore. Our children playschools are in Singapore. So whenever we are in Mandurah, we would be living at my Mother-In Law's (MIL).



The gallery lined up on their entrance hallway.




I was at the front door & this is the first view when I entered.



This time however, we went back with another family. My best friend has a one year old (the same age as my son but is smitten by my 2 year old daughter instead).

Having the extra number of people means more space required. So we searched through the net for an appropriate place for our family. I couldn't just leave them there to stay on their own while we live with my MIL. It's just not nice. The whole point is to experience the trip together.

We found a nice big house in Mandurah. It's situated right in front of the water. I couldn't have express it better than the owner himself. Here's the link... http://www.stayz.com.au/102062

If you know me well, you would know how I am. I either love or hate a place. I love to share my experience, be it a good one or a bad one. If it's a bad one, I would like to warn people against it. If it's a good place, I would love to share it....

The Front of the house

We had shortlisted about 4 houses towards the end of our planning. Why this house finally? They were personalised with their approach. There was no agent handing the keys to us, there was no feel of a business transaction. What we felt since we made the phone call was a simple proud house owner who wants to share his beautiful home & the experience the house brought him.



Second floor - at the balcony




Check out the view!





There's a little jetty right in front & we always call out to those fishing asking if they caught something & if they wanna share! Haha





View looking to the right side of the balcony

 We have 3 babies in tow. So before the trip, we were (as all mothers were) concern about safety issues, cots, etc. We wrote a long email, also explaining that my best friend has OCD which means if the house is not clean, she will turn back & not stay there.

The owner patiently attended to our woes & worries. He then called us & told us that he has children too so there are already 2 cots in there, safety gates & if we wanted it, he could have all the decorations removed too. Well, I thought that was too easy to be true.... so anyway, we chose this house.

It was right in front of the water. When we arrived, the owner's mom came by with chocolate & wine. A little something from the owner to settle us in !I thought that was rather sweet. We were given a little tour through the house. And my best friend’s eyes were wide opened. Mind you she is used to a 6 star hotel so we didn't think she was going to even like this place.... but she said yes when she saw the pictures & at that moment she seemed like she loves it.



Ground floor - front porch





Big lawn. They plan to put a pool one day.

 

 


The children were happily looking around & testing the new ground. The owner's mom asked if she should remove anything for the sake of the children. We said it wont be necessary. One thing that impressed us was the decoration. It was decorated as if it was their own home. It didn't feel like a short term rent house at all. They trusted us with their home feel treasures. So to have them removed would only remove the joy of feeling like we are "coming home"



I never could snap my camera fast enough to catch the dolphins jumping but you can see them wimming in there. At least 8 of them that day.





See the tiny black dots .... those were the dolphins!



That's the word for it. It feels like we are going home. It feels nice & warm. Never mind the fact that it's summer! ;)

The view in front of the house was phenomenal! Complete view of the water & while "mommy" (can't help it, the owner's mother made us feel so welcomed!) was showing us around, as we stood at the balcony,7 dolphins decided to swim by. We stopped, completely awed by the beautiful serenity of this place.

As hours passes, we finally started to settle in. We realised that everything we need was there. Thats the advantage of having the owner staying here as well.(Yeah he said he comes home to that house whenever he is in Mandurah.) He knows what is necessary in this household.

We have rented some houses in Australia before. Some didn't even provide hand towels or toilet papers. But this place, you literally feel like you just need to pack your clothing & the children's stuff of course. Everything else was provided.

We love it. We stayed there for 10 days. "Mommy" called us on the 5th day asking if we were alright & if we need anything. No, we said. This place is perfect. There is a beautiful book which welcomes comments from anyone who stays there.

We looked through it and everyone has the same feel that I almost feel like what I was gonna say is not special enough. The owner conveys welcoming warmth & ease that we just know that we are taken care of. He has his mom helping him with handing over the keys. The “tour” by “mommy” …. She initiated herself apparently like a proud owner.

We had a wonderful 10 days there. We are looking at heading back "home" again soon. The search is over. We found what we want & we are sticking to it. :)

Thank you for letting us use your beautiful house.